|
Photo: Tim Bauer |
Here is an interview that Richard Butler did on the Personal File section in the January 14, 1987 issue of British magazine Smash Hits.
Full name: "Richard Lofthouse Butler. I never use the Lofthouse bit though, because I don't like it enough. I think the whole idea of middle names is old-fashioned. No one ever uses them anyway so they're useless."
Born: "6/5/56 in Kingston, Surrey."
Where do you live? "New York – in a very nice basement apartment. It's all white and open plan and I'm very happy there. I don't like inviting people round though because there's loads of kick marks on the door and the bathroom door's kicked in because I get very. . . temperamental sometimes! When I get angry I kick my own doors in and there's also a few punch marks in the walls because parts of the walls are made out of plasterboard. I never hit people though!"
Have you got one of those flush things that you hang down inside the loo? "No. I don't like blue water. I don't trust blue water. I like to see what color my pee is, ha ha ha! I can't say that? What do you expect me to say?!!"
First crush: "Ooooh that was at primary school. I remember her name was Sandra. . . er, did I kiss her? Yes! Properly? Er. . . no, I was terrible! I remember my second crush was a girl called Audrey. Everybody kissed her properly."
When did you last do the hoovering? "I never do the hoovering. Sometimes, if I'm in a good mood. I'll give myself the choice of washing the kitchen floor or doing the hoovering and I always opt for the kitchen floor. I'm pretty good at it yeah, it's quick and easy and when I've done it the floor always gleams. Do I use Flash? Er. . . I don't think you get that in America!"
Why do you look like David Bowie? "Ha ha ha! I don't think I do actually! Perhaps a passing resemblance. . . Actually I was at a party ages ago in New York and John Lydon (from P.I.L) was there and his girlfriend said I looked really similar to him and. . . well, I suppose I do ha ha!"
Do you think that Stan from The Housemartins looks like David Bowie? "Er. . . I've never seen or heard of The Housemartins. They've just had a number one? Oh. I have heard they're spotty. I don't think it's really my kind of music anyway – I heard it was a bit wimpy. It's not? Er. . . well, I don't really like pop music anyway – I like rock music."
Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? "An out-of-body experience? Ha ha! I've been out of my brain a few times! Not out of my body though. I'm sure I will have one one day – not that I'm waiting for it or anything – but I'm sure everybody dies, don't they? I know one girl who almost died in a car crash and she said that it happened to her – she was suddenly above the hospital bed watching the nurses pumping the blood back into her and then she started floating up and up and up. That seems alright!"
What's the most horrendous thing you've ever worn? "Oh, I think that was when I was a kid and I bought myself a satin polo-neck with a velcro over-flap thing – I can't even remember what color it was but it was disgusting. My mother had taken me out to the shops to buy something and she cried when I insisted that was what I wanted! I don't think she could believe her son had such bad taste. And I've never looked back since!"
Have you ever smeared yourself with chocolate mousse? "No. Whipped cream! Yeah, I wanted to try it with a girl I was with at the time but the thing is it turns to butter really quickly and goes all disgusting. So we had to have a shower ha ha!"
What end of the bath do you sit at? "The opposite end to the taps. I don't like having my head next to the taps because I like being able to lie back and relax. I fell asleep in the bath once – woke up in cold water. I think that's the nearest I've come to an out-of-body experience!"
What color is love? "Oooooh. . . hot pink with blue stripes. I couldn't say, really – it varies, it really does, but I think it's. . . it's purple actually – very rich with a hint of decadence about it."
Have you ever seen a butler? "Yes! Yes, I did an advert for a clothes store in L.A. years and years and years ago where I had to dress up as a butler and just sort of stand there. No I didn't look like a bimbo – I thought I looked quite good actually! Normally I'm such a scruffy sod, you see, and this time I looked very smart."
|
This is the ad Richard Butler was talking about. |
If you had to do one of the following, which would it be: a) run a butcher's shop with Samantha Fox b) go abseiling with Gyles Brandreth c) go and see Torvill And Dean with Mick Talbot of The Style Council or d) be Harvey Smith's horse in the Horse Of The Year show? "That's a grim selection, isn't it? I'd hate to do any of those things. I don't find Samantha Fox remotely attractive. And running a butcher's shop was never one of my ambitions. I don't eat meat! It's not very good for you for one thing – I stopped eating it completely about three years ago when I decided to start looking after myself. I don't miss it in the slightest. Who's Gyles Brandreth anyway? Whoever he is I wouldn't go abseiling with him because I'm really scared of heights. I can go up to towers or something but when I get to the top I have to really hold on to something because I really feel like I'm going to fall off. It's terrifying. I always feel like I'm capable of jumping off. As for going to see Torvill and Dean with Mick Talbot – well, the idea of doing something bland with someone bland doesn't really appeal in the slightest! It's like eating sliced bread for dinner. Like eating Wonderlife. What's that? It's bread! Oh dear. I think I've been in America too long. . . Actually I think being Harvey Smith's horse is the most attractive one! Ha ha!"
If you had to have a head transplant, whose head would you have? "Er. . . do you know the actor Eric Roberts? Oh. Well, take it from me – he looks great. Actually, no, I think I'll have Beethoven's head – he looks really great. I quite like the idea of people making busts of my head for the next two hundred years ha ha!"
Have you ever thought you were a bus stop? "Ha! No. I've never thought I was a bus stop. I never stay in one place long enough. I can honestly say I'm nothing like a bus stop."